My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
oh she sang at gmail dot com
All Fires
“ Groups that wish to engage in discrimination should not expect public subsidies,” said the Rev. Barry W. Lynn ”
NYTimes story with context; emphasis mine.
How long will it take for people (ARCHDIOCEASE OF WASHINGTON, I’M LOOKING AT YOU) to understand that?
Mash Note to The Midwest
I have only been inside you twice.
I like your white burly men with their thick arms and round guts.
I like that you are without ideology. I like that your high rate of violent crimes contradict any illusions of ‘prairie life’. Your cities were built by union men and women and your kids think that’s cool. I appreciate your middle class blacks, white taxi drivers and your not-at-all-assimilated Mexicans.
I am scared of most of your women, though, they seem violent.
Your BBQ has too much vinegar poured on it, but I like that it’s offered in drive thrus named SPEED QUEEN.
I like that you are without Western Neurosis, East Coast Pretension, and Southern Formality. You are informal and fleshy.
You cherish dairy and beef.
You are distinctly American and I find that so loveable.
To Milwaukee from Los Angeles, I am burning up for your love! FOR YOUR LOVVVEE.
yarrrrr I miss Chicago. It is nice and crisp and freezing, and there are cars, and correct hot dogs, and yes.
Bou-tros, Bou-tros Gha-li
Boutros, Bou-tros Gha-li
Ko-fi, Ko-fi Ann-an
Want your Ban Ki-Moon
I feel like U Thant would be the easiest to work in there, and yet, he is missing.
Clementines are the most delicious food in the entire world. They are the only thing that makes winter tolerable.
I bring six clementines to work every day and eat them all.
Timeline of How I Fucked Up My House's Holiday Gift Exchange
- 8:15 - encourage housemates to pull names from grab bag now
- 8:17 - write out slips, realize I have written my own name on every strip. Laugh to myself, then announce my idiocy. Heckled.
- 8:18 - roommate takes slip-writing privileges from me
- 8:20 - draw names from a debate trophy
- 8:20 - pull own name; forget to tell anyone until we acknowledge we’re done
- 8:22 - Round 2 of name drawing
- 8:22 - pull two names unwittingly
- 8:24 - heckled for fucking up the grab bag again
- 8:28 - Round 5 of name drawing
- 8:30 - SUCCESS!
- 8:32 - throw out slip
- 8:32:30 - realize I have forgotten who I have
- well fuck.
